So What Is All The Fuss About Love Anyway?

Just type in the word LOVE and search the web.  As of today, there are over 7 billion results.  BILLION with a B!  Clearly, there are a lot of people focused on the subject - and it is crazy to see the myriad of things written.  Some sweet and sentimental, others, well, not so much.  There seems to be a lot of advice on what it is, how it works, what to do, how to behave...but after really looking, I found most of it empty and devoid of anything honest or practical.  I began looking, searching, hoping to find someone with answers after a very painful event in my marriage.  Good old-fashioned love advice.  How to deal, what to do, steps to take.  And I found a lot of information.  But with all those 7 billion (billion!!) sites, everything seemed empty.  So I prayed.  I cried.  I journaled.  I read my Bible.  And still, I had questions.  While making a quick run into the local Family Dollar store (needed toilet paper and Windex - life still happens, even when it is falling apart!) I found a book.  It was sitting there on the shelf, shouting out at me.  I actually looked around to see if anyone else noticed how LOUDLY it was sitting there.  A Love Worth Giving.  A paperback book by Max Lucado.  Ok, I am familiar with the author and know his work.  He is good.  A bargain price at only $3 bucks, so why not?  I bought 2 copies.  One for me, one for the husband.  Maybe Max could answer the questions I had after reading, reading and re-reading 1 Corinthians 13.  I didn't even open the cover, just picked it up (hoping that would quiet the very LOUD way that book had been sitting on that shelf) and put it on the counter along with the Charmin and Windex.  I was carrying a lot of shame because I actually wondered what the check-out person would think of me, buying 2 copies of this book?  Would they feel my desperation?  Judge me harshly for my mistakes?  See my pain?  More than anything, I did not want to be transparent.  Not that day.  I hurried home, grabbed my highlighter (I deface books by highlighting things that really speak to me.  Even my Bible.)  and jumped into the book.  Now, let me explain that I had been pouring over 1 Corinthians 13.  That good ol' chapter known as 'the love guide' in the Bible.  I had read other scripture as well, but this one left me with questions.  Lots of them.  And Max wrote this little book, A Love Worth Giving.  And I bought it.  And opened it.  And began reading...Chapter One - The 7:47 Principle.  Based on the verse from 1 John 4:19, "We love because He first loved us."; it seemed a good start.  Why do we love?  Because God loved us first.  Good.  Foundational.  Instructive.  Good.  Then came chapter 2.  Chapter Two - Love's Flagship.  Based on the verse, wait for it...1 Corinthians 13:4.  WHAT?  REALLY?  This is where my questions began!  Love is patient.  Okay.  For how long?  And good old Max started in.  Explaining to me, tenderly, gently but forthrightly, what it means to be patient in love.  He reminded me that the Bible says that a person who is forgiven a little shows only little love.  That we cannot give what we have never received.  That our typical strategy for treating a troubled relationship is to TRY HARDER.  And that is where we begin to fail.  We miss a very important step.  Reminder - our first step toward loving others must be to love God - to be a child of the king.  To receive the love of a forgiving God.  To understand and remember that He first loved us.  And when we find it hard to love, we must focus on loving Christ and following His example.  I am not doing the book any favors - you really should read chapter 2.  Max is clever and sincere.  He made me refocus and really think.  Why is patience listed first when you read what love is in 1 Corinthians 13?  Love is patient.  That comes first.  So, I read, and then read again, Chapter 2.  Highlighter in hand, I marked up that little book.  Lots of little nugggets tucked in there, now yellow and glaring at me from the pages before me.  Max is right.  When trying to love, really love, love when it is hard and frankly, not in us, we do need help from an outside source.  A transfusion, he wrote.  Here is what I am coming to understand.  Love, like patience, is not easy when we try to do it our own way.  The world's way.  Gee, the world tells us that life is too short!  If it is hard, walk away and find something new, something better!  After all, we deserve to be happy!  Life is just too short to deal with unhappiness and difficulty!  Even well meaning Christian people say this.  Well, been there, done that.  Guess what?  Happiness the world's way is temporary.  I am on a mission for something better.  Something permanent.  It is not easy.  Patience?  You have to be kidding me.  I don't yell at people who cut me off in traffic.  I am not easily angered (most of the time).  People make mistakes, I know because of all my own.  I try to give people the benefit of the doubt.  But when the big stuff comes, when backed into the corner and the only option is to come out swinging or take the blows, my patience is tested.  Which option will I choose, when my option is to hurt or be hurt?  Patience says be still.  Be still and know.  Allow God to stand before me.  Rely on faith and put up with the pain.  After all, some pain has been brought on by my own mistakes.  Pesky, those consequences.  He has a plan and I am not to "lean unto my own understanding."  His ways are greater than my ways and all of my effort, all of my will power is ridiculous if it doesn't match up to God's plan.  So, here I am.  Digging into my Bible, into Max's book, open hearted and willing to learn.  Love is patient.  Whew - this is going to take a lot of prayer.  I am a victim of the age in which I live.  As much as I hate to admit it, drive-through mentality has taken a toll on me and I'd prefer to be patient now, thank you very much.  Waiting grates my nerves.  So.  Step 1.  Learn what all the fuss is about.  Learn to love, God's way.  Learn to be still and know.  Learn to be (gulp) patient.  Wait.  More later.  Be patient!